I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
