we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize