If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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