is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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