Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
