Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
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