Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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