You work out of a Hotel?
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
