I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
