He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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