Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize
