Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
