Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
