2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
