how can u be prego again
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
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