i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize