sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
