he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Randomize
