Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
