ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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