there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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