Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
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