The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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