just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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