Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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