hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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