to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize