Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
