omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
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