I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
