He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
