I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
