I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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