I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
