so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Randomize
