Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
