i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
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