Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
