Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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