I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Just high enough for therapy.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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