They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
