Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Oh god it's open bar.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
