I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
