I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
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Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
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One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
im on a boat
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