Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
it glows. i had to have it.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
