Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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