Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
