Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
