So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
