butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
