Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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