I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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