Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
